Legacy of Caring

I was recently in NYC for a blogging/social media conference.  Johnson and Johnson was there and requested some bloggers to make videos describing something that they care about.  Naturally, those living with chronic illness are frequently on my heart {although I had to quickly decide to talk about that OR foster care OR human trafficking OR the bazillion other things that I care about and pierce my heart}.

I chose to speak about how living WELL with chronic illness is something I am passionate about. It is easy to get depressed and caught up in the negative aspects of illness.  I much prefer to focus on the blessings{and I think it is ultimately better for my health that way}.

Here is the clip of my interview:

What is an issue you care deeply about?  I would love to know so please leave me a comment!

Flowers fade

I am not a gardener.

I am pretty sure both my thumbs are black.

When we downsized and moved in December, I didn’t pay much attention the landscaping on our new home’s lot.

I was so pleasantly surprised a few weeks ago when pretty pink bushes bloomed out front.  A luscious purple bush in the back, with a perfect view from the screened in porch. And then, my favorite, the bluish purple flowers that are weaving their way up our lamp post in the front yard.

I am not a gardener.

I don’t know a chrysanthemum from a forsynthia but I do know pretty when I see it.

I appreciate the beauty of the flowers and at the same time I realize that under my lethal eye, those plants probably won’t last long.

My flower has faded these past few days.  Withered in pain and fatigue from an illness that is sneaky and demanding.

And, the gift of today is knowing that no matter what flower fades in my life, my God and His Word are the same.  Yesterday. Today. Forever.

What a gift.

  Join us in unwrapping our gifts here today.

Expect the Unexpected

Today for Thankful Thursday, our host Lynne chose the theme of being thankful for the unexpected.

Ha! That could be the theme of my life so I decided to do a little time line post of how God took the unexpected (to me, not to Him) and worked it for good in my life.

• Time in foster care When I was a tween girl my family imploded.  The result was myself (and eventually my brothers) being removed from our home for a time.  While I am fortunate that my time in foster care  was not long term (about a year and then I went to live with my grandparents) I am thankful for it now.  It softened my heart and created a passion in me for orphans and foster children to have forever families.
• Teen pregnancy While it can be argued that pregnancy should not have surprised me, given my promiscuous lifestyle at the time, I was nonetheless shocked when I learned I was pregnant at 16.  Those of you that know the rest of the story know that being a teen mom is what led me to finding the redeeming grace of Jesus.  How can I not be thankful for that?
• Chronic Illness I certainly never imagined that diseases I cannot control would have such an impact on my life.  But, like only He can, God has used my inability to maintain my previous break-neck speed lifestyle to woo me back to His side.  I have such a feeling of purpose and peace that I didn’t know before I became ill.

I could go on and on about the way God has used unexpected trials to produce unlimited blessings and growth in my life.  And I am so thankful for every one!

Invisible Tuesday (on Wednesday)

Tune into MomTV today(Wednesday) at 1pm EST for the latest episode of The Invisibles.

Today’s show will focus on Optimism and Chronic Illness.

Here are some links I mention in the show, in case you weren’t able to catch them and the outline of what we will be discussing.

The Power of Attitude:

American Autoimmune Related Diseases Assoc.

Great book: Living Well with Autoimmune Disease

How to have a positive attitude:

• Educate yourself
• Take care of yourself
• Manage fatigue
• Enjoy yourself
• Maintain healthy relationships
• Mind over matter
• Expect bumps (fmaware.org)
• Stockpile fun distractions (fmaware.org)
• Find a hobby (helium)

Are you an optimist or pessimist quiz?  Lifescript

Remember that if you miss the live show, it is available for replay anytime!

Thankful through Trials

People are often taken aback when I say that I am thankful for my illness.  There are many reasons that I feel that my MS diagnosis has been a blessing for me and my family.  I would have probably never slowed down and lived for the moment if not for MS.  I would not have been forced to deal with the deep-seated emotional issues I had spent my whole life holding in.  I would not have learned to let go of the small stuff and be (a tad) less controlling.

In the grand scheme of things our time on this earth is not about us.  It is about how we live our lives for God’s glory.  I spent a week or two really upset last month when I found out I also have systemic lupus. “It’s not fair” and “why me” came out of my mouth and my heart.  I was feeling very sorry for myself And then I remembered:  my trials and issues are really insignificant.  When you are able to step out of your pity party and look at the world around you, it is easy to see that I don’t have it so bad.  I have learned about the plight of chronically ill people in third world countries- hello?  How can I complain when they have no access to healthcare at all?  There are orphans in Eastern Europe that are institutionalized for life (just put in cribs at the age of four) simply because they have Down Syndrome.  Babies that are suffocated at birth because of deformities.

I think of how much this type of atrocity must pain our Lord.  How He must yearn for us to get out of our own little self absorbed box and find ways to help those that are less fortunate and more oppressed than we could ever imagine being.

What would the world be like if we all took an interest in other people’s problems rather than our own?  If we focused on loving everyone we come in contact with instead of trying to leverage situations for our own benefit?

I have been just as guilty as the rest of allowing myself to wallow in my trials.  But, the Lord is speaking to my heart so loudly lately, particularly through a passage in Isaiah 58:6-12

Is this not the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break over every yoke?  Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter-when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?  Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard.  Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say:  Here am I.

If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk, and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness and your night will become like the noonday.

The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sunscorched land and will strengthen your frame.  You will be like a well watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.

Now, I don’t know about you but I am interested in feeling like a well watered garden and am thankful the Lord provides the guidelines for doing so.

And, in the midst of a season of thankfulness I pray that none of us lose sight of the true reason for the season!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Invisible Tuesday

Some of you know that I host a MomTV show on Wednesdays (at 1pm EST) called The Invisibles. The show focuses on living well with chronic/invisible illness.  To help my listeners and to educate my readers, I am going to start posting on the same topic that my show will focus on each week on Tuesdays.

Tomorrow’s show topic is Minimizing the Impact of Your Illness on Your Loved Ones.  Here are some tips related to what I share on the show.

• Your family member’s are not stupid, don’t treat them like they are.  Don’t say “I’m fine” if you aren’t.  Trust is an important component of family life.  Don’t become someone your family doesn’t trust.
• Remember that there are things children do not need to know specifics about (including finances and treatments)
• Resist the temptation to downplay your hubby’s headache when everything on your body hurts. Don’t make it a “one up” type of situation.
• If you lash out in anger, forget something important, etc.- apologize.  Don’t apologize for your illness but for your behavior.
• Plan your day so that you are at your best when you are around your family.  If that means taking a nap before they get home, it is worth it.
• Don’t buy in to the lie of the Devil that you are a burden or problem to your family. They love you and need you.
• Reach out.  Don’t shut out.

For all my tips and thoughts on this subject watch the Invisibles tomorrow.

Thankful no matter what…

Today’s theme for Thankful Thursday is trials.  I think that is an appropriate topic for me to write about given the events of the last few weeks (or my whole life if you want to get technical).

Some of you may remember that I broke out in (what they thought were) hives about six weeks ago.  After almost a month with no relief, the results of a skin biopsy revealed that the hives were actually lupus.  Further testing revealed that I have systemic lupus (and my diagnosis of multiple sclerosis is still also accurate).

The lupus diagnosis hit me kind of hard.  I am normally a pretty positive, give it to God, don’t worry about what you can’t control kind of gal.

I don’t know if it was because this was so unexpected r maybe because I am just human, but I felt sorry for myself with a capital S for a good week.

Isn’t it somebody else’s turn to have some problems?

Why does so and so go through life with no worries and they aren’t even walking with the Lord?

Haven’t I proven myself faithful to You yet, Lord?

I didn’t want to feel that way and prayed that God would help me crawl out of my funk…and He is never One to let me down when I ask for direction.

Ironically (or not) it was the word’s in the book of Job that turned my attitude around:

What I feared has come upon me; what I dreaded has happened to me.  I have no peace, no quietness, I have no rest, but only turmoil. Job 3:25-26

Yup that is exactly where I was- keeping myself up at night with the “what-if’s”, the fear of the unknown, googling all the complications that can come from having two complicated autoimmune disorders…

Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation?…have you ever given orders to the morning, or shown the dawn its place?…Who endowed the heart with wisdom or gave understanding to the mind? (from the book of Job)

Ouch! God reminded me through those verses and snippets of life experiences He has already brought me through, that I am gfocusing on the wrong thing.  I should not be focusing on the trial but the comforting promise that God already has it handled. This is no surprise to Him.

So, my answer to being thankful and having peace through difficult circumstances also comes from the book of Job (Job’s answer to God and mine too)

I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted. Job 42:2-3

I’m not worried.  I’m not mad.  I am thankful that I have a God carrying these burdens for me.  I just have to remember to give Him my burdens each time they rear their ugly heads.