So Long Insecurity, Hello Me

I am reading Beth Moore’s newest book, So Long Insecurity…You’ve been a bad friend to us.

Wow, has God been using this book to touch my heart and thunk (may have just made up another word) on the head about some things. One of them is embracing who I am, who He made me to be rather than being so worried about how others perceive who I am, if I come on too strong, if I talk too much, etc. I am just me.
I re-took the Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator test because I wanted to know who I am today. I had taken it many times as a young adult (because my grandmother is certified to administer the test) and in college but I know that I have changed and grown over the last ten years.
Here are my results:
Idealist Portrait of the Teacher (ENFJ)

Even more than the other Idealists, Teachers have a natural talent for leading students or trainees toward learning, or as Idealists like to think of it, they are capable of calling forth each learner’s potentials. Teachers (around two percent of the population) are able – effortlessly, it seems, and almost endlessly-to dream up fascinating learning activities for their students to engage in. In some Teachers, this ability to fire the imagination can amount to a kind of genius which other types find hard to emulate. But perhaps their greatest strength lies in their belief in their students. Teachers look for the best in their students, and communicate clearly that each one has untold potential, and this confidence can inspire their students to grow and develop more than they ever thought possible.

In whatever field they choose, Teachers consider people their highest priority, and they instinctively communicate personal concern and a willingness to become involved. Warmly outgoing, and perhaps the most expressive of all the types, Teachers are remarkably good with language, especially when communicating in speech, face to face. And they do not hesitate to speak out and let their feelings be known. Bubbling with enthusiasm, Teachers will voice their passions with dramatic flourish, and can, with practice, become charismatic public speakers. This verbal ability gives Teachers a good deal of influence in groups, and they are often asked to take a leadership role.

Teachers like things settled and organized, and will schedule their work hours and social engagements well ahead of time-and they are absolutely trustworthy in honoring these commitments. Valuing as they do interpersonal cooperation and harmonious relations, Teachers are extraordinarily tolerant of others, are easy to get along with, and are usually popular wherever they are.

Teachers are highly sensitive to others, which is to say their intuition tends to be well developed. Certainly their insight into themselves and others is unparalleled. Without a doubt, they know what is going on inside themselves, and they can read other people with uncanny accuracy. Teachers also identify with others quite easily, and will actually find themselves picking up the characteristics, emotions, and beliefs of those around them. Because they slip almost unconsciously into other people’s skin in this way, Teachers feel closely connected with those around them, and thus show a sincere interest in the joys and problems of their employees, colleagues, students, clients, and loved ones.

My thoughts: God has a sense of humor, doesn’t he? The one thing I keep telling Him He picked the wrong girl to do (teach/speak) is the title of my personality profile. Hardy har har, God.

And I was right, my personality has changed…just a bit from when I was younger. I used to be an ENFP. I can totally see how the J (judging) part has become more prominent in my personality, I think molded by experiences and maturity.

So, today I am unwrapping the gift of me. Who God created and molded me to be and being completely okay with it (or on the way to being okay with it )
This post is linked here.

**If you choose to click on the link and purchase Beth Moore’s latest book from Amazon, I would receive a small commission as an Amazon affiliate.**

At The Martha Stewart Show

Absolutely excited to be at the Martha Stewart show right now! Part of the live blogging audience for her special blog show. Please follow me on Twitter and you can follow the hashtag #blogshow to get all our live updates. Will post all about my NYC adventure as soon as I get home.

Focus for 2010

Well, if you read my blog or know me at all, you know that I am not a fan of New Year’s resolutions.  My God is not bound by time frames and can convict me any day of the year to begin a good thing or complete a work in me.  I am, however, a planner.  Goal oriented, purpose driven, Type A all the way…you know the kind.

I was excited to see other ladies making their blogging goals for 2010 public as that is the best way to be held accountable.  And, I want to do the same.  Here are my goals/plans for blogging in 2010.

When I started this blog in June ‘08 I never imagined that any one, other than my family and IRL friends would read it.  I never imagined that I would get to meet such fabulous women, make lasting friendships and garner intense support from people via the internet.  But God did.

He knew that this was the perfect outlet for me to vent, write, laugh, cry, and hopefully inspire others through. I am so thankful for the blogging community and the ability to share of myself through this venue.

And for 2010:

1. Stay true to the vision.  I started this blog as a way to chronicle my journey living with chronic illness.  I blog about it frequently here as well as MomActive and my MomTV show, The Invisibles.  Being a patient is part of who I am and I want to make sure that those readers coming here for encouragement due to living with a chronic illness are able to find it.  While there are many other aspects of myself I love to and will continue to share on this blog, I am re-committed to regular posting about this important issue.
2. Stay true to myself.  I admit that there are subjects I have not tackled on my blog because I don’t want to offend, read negative comments, subject myself to criticism, etc.  I have been a wimp, to put it succinctly.  If I have an opinion on a subject and (after prayer and careful consideration) feel led to post on it, I am going to do so (to steal MckMama’s word) boldly.  I will not be quiet ever again out of concern for blog stats, losing followers, etc.  I need to be who God calls me to be….period.
3. Stay focused.  I have a lot going on in this online world.  I write for several sites, manage three blogs and a social network of my own, host two blog talk radio shows, a momtv show and more.  Spreading yourself too thin is something I caution clients against all the time.  I am not as good at taking my own advice.  I have spent a lot of time thinking about how to streamline my sites and maximize my time.  I will be merging my other blogs to this one (look for site construction in February) with the goal of just having this site and my social network to manage by the end.  That way I can focus on quality content, quality shows and quality interaction.
4. Stay on schedule.  I have implemented a computer schedule to insure that I am giving ample attention to my family.  I am going to continue with this schedule through 2010 and support others in doing the same.  No matter how  many people I minister to through my blog and other online ventures, it is worth nothing if I am not meeting the needs of those God has entrusted to my direct care: my spouse and children.  I have also made a writing schedule including themes and topics for the entire year.  I hope this will help make my writing and computer time more efficient.
5. Stay connected. God has blessed me with wonderful friendships via the internet.  I have had the pleasure of meeting several of you in real life thanks to conferences and events.  I plan to be selective about the events I attend in 2010 and can’t wait to make new friends and continue to develop the friendships already established online.  I also want to connect with my readers.  I want to focus on my BlogFrog community and Facebook fan page as a way to reach out and engage my readers.  Any suggestions are welcome!
6. Stay educated.  That sounds stupid but I am trying to keep with my stay theme, okay?  Anyways, I am not a tech savvy person.  I am committed to learning how to add plug-ins, make basic changes to my blog,etc without being afraid that I will cause something to go terribly wrong.  It is also not in my budget to continue to pay someone to make these changes for me this year.  I will be edumacating (hee, hee) myself about Wordpress this year- YIKES!

So, those are my blogging goals for 2010.  What do you think?  Is there anything missing?  Anything you wish I would write more or less about?  Give it to me straight- I love to hear from you!

For more Blogging Goals from Savvy Bloggers click here.

Starting the year off right

I first heard about The Bible in 90 days challenge on Twitter (and if you don’t tweet, this is just another reason to hop on the bandwagon with the rest of us

Reading through the entire Bible is something I have only done two other times in my life and both times were quite a while ago.  Having the accountability and encouragement from other moms going through the same program sounded great to me.  And what better way to start off the year?

Of course when you commit to doing something like this, the  enemy is not happy.  So, I knew to be expecting some hurdles to this endeavor, which we have committed to doing January 1st through March 31, 2010.

The last few days (part of the road trip gone wrong: watch for post on Wednesday) have not been conducive to reading of any kind and I was already feeling defeated.

But, then I started to catch up on the reading and was immediately blessed.  In our reading from yesterday (way back in Genesis) we are reminded to bring our petitions to God because He is listening (and remembers).

I was immediately encouraged and caught up with the reading.  It is not too late for you either…why don’t you join us in this quest to get deep in God’s word in 2010?  Your faithfulness will surely be rewarded.

Leave me a comment if you are going to join the challenge so I can check up on you hold you accountable!

Outraged

So, I was born in Maryland and consider the Eastern Shore of Maryland my true home.  However, for the last fifteen years I have lived in West Virginia-  the Mountain State.  My husband was born and raised here, my children were born and are being raised here.

And I happen to love it here!

Imagine my dismay when I discovered this piece of journalism trash posted on the website of a DC television station’s website (that I used to watch, USED to watch)

Here is the full text of the offensive article:

Now the news that West Virginia has put a whole bunch of its important vital records on the Internet certainly raises the possibility of all kinds of cheap shots at our yokel neighbors to the West.

But that’d be completely unfair, a gross stereotype about our neighbors’ tar-paper shacks, which probably don’t even have enough electricity to power a Commodore anyway.

But if they did have one, they’d be able to log on to the new Web site and do all kinds of research, says the Herald-Mail. Here, for example, is a listing of all the birth certificates for people named Cletus. Here’s a listing of all the Twittys who’ve died in the state. And here’s a listing of all the weddings in the state where both the bride and the groom had the last name “Smith.”

Isn’t it enough that they have to poop in their backyard, running through the cold, fearing that the trap door on their red flannel pajamas should pop open early, exposing their nether regions to the bite of the winds? Why do we have to make fun of them for their misfortune?

So we won’t.

The site has all the data they have that’s legally shareable. Birth certificates can’t be shared for 100 years; death certificates are on ice for 50. Records from the Civil War aren’t available, as well as a few gaps where fire or flood took out a courthouse or two.

But if you’ve ever wondered what Hank Williams’ death registry looks like (you can put your hand down), now you can die happy. (And have someone from WV look at it 50 years later, once the Internet finally comes to the state.)

Copyright NBC Local Media First Published: Dec 18, 2009 8:50 AM EST

While I am aware there are people in this state living in extreme poverty (as there are in many states) the insinuation that to live in West Virginia means that you are an uneducated “yokel” infuriates me.

Why am I sharing this with you, my dear readers?  Not just for the sake of venting about something that has me very upset but because I know that  many of you live in the MD/DC/VA/WV area.

If this is the case I am asking you to join me in asking for a public apology by the station and the “reporter” who wrote the original piece.  You can do that by clicking here.

Now, I am going to drink a cup of coffee and enjoy the beautiful view of snow covered mountains from my front porch.

The Stranger in the Bed

So today, here’s the question I want to ask: have you ever been at a low point in your marriage? How did you turn it around?

It was a Friday in early 2004.

I won’t go into how frustrating a time it was that the school system was unable to deal with a troubled boy, how patient my employer was with my frequent disappearances to handle emergencies, how this situation impacted our other children…

but I will tell you I felt distraught and I felt alone.

Alone?  Why would I feel alone when I had a husband by my side?

Because we were dealing with the implosion of our family in very different ways.

Retreat. Turn inward.  Immerse yourself in work. Minimize the problem.  That was Mike’s way of coping.

Resent. Over-extend.  Immerse  yourself in guilt and shame.  Try to control the problem.  That was my way of coping.

Neither of us were coping in a way that was conducive to our relationship.  We lay in bed at night, backs to each other, both having so much to say and fall asleep to silence.

When we did speak, it was throwing “You don’t do this” and “You should be doing this” statements around instead of leaning into each other for the support both of us desperately needed at the time.

We spoke of the D word.

Then a Pastor reminded us that this situation was not either one of our doing.  That we had become so focused on the problem we had lost sight of part of the solution- coming together and working as a team.

It took getting some time away together, re-focusing on our marriage as a priority, and some good old-fashioned marriage counseling…but we got through it.

By the grace of God we got through a difficult time.  We did not know it then but that period of trial in our marriage was preparing us for far more difficult times ahead.  Times that we would be able to withstand because our focus was back on our team.

Mike+Melissa+God= A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.  Ecclesiastes 4:12

Visit To Love, Honor and Vacuum for more Wifey Wednesday posts.

Merry Christmas!

ahem, I mean SITSmas! Some of my favorite blogging gals are sharing the holiday spirit and I wanted to join in too.  But, I have a problem….I have no (and I mean zilch, zip, nada) Christmas decorations up and I am having trouble getting in the spirit.

We are moving (just around the corner and due to my health) next week so all my decorations are packed up and waiting for me to unveil them at our new home…

which looks like this…

So for now I will say Merry Christmas to all of you and if you want to know the real reason I celebrate this holiday you can read this post.

And, the angel on my Christmas tree, the bow on all my presents this year is knowing I will get to see my SITS gals in Baltimore (like, right up the road!!) in March.

Hickory Farms Review

For as long as I can remember, Hickory Farms has been a part of the holidays.  My grandmother uses their sausages and cheeses to keep everyone from getting impatient while waiting for the holiday meal to be ready….wait a minute, so do I.  *gasp*  I’ve become my grandmother!

This Thanksgiving was the first I have cooked for my family (yes, I know I am lucky).  We usually go to either my mom’s or my grandmother’s but this year, neither was in the cards.

But, me being a smart multi-tasking mama and all, I stole borrowed my grandmother’s idea and used the Hickory Farms sausage and cheese to make a snack platter.  It was quite successful in keeping the hungry vultures tween boys from whining that the turkey wasn’t ready yet.

Doesn’t that look yummy? (and nicely displayed if I might say so myself)

Our gift box came with two summer sausages and three different types of cheese- Pennsylvania Dutch Edam, Sharp Wisconsin Cheddar and Apple Pie Cheddar.  I love cheese, especially sharp cheddar so that was obviously my favorite.  My boys like the edam cheese, it was very mild in flavor.

So, for future reference, sausage and cheese platters keep hungry boys out of the kitchen on Thanksgiving…and they make great gifts too.

“I wrote this review while participating in a blog tour campaign by Mom Central on behalf of Hickory Farms and received a Hickory Farms gift basket to facilitate my review.”

Monday Mingle

I love participating in Monday Mingle, hosted by Eighty MPH Mom, because it gives you, my sweet readers, an opportunity to get to know me better.  The woman behind the words =)  Have a great week!

WW- The where have I been edition…

I took a break from all things internet and headed south last Wednesday to meet this little guy:

My sweet little nephew (born Oct.4) Treyden Edward

We had a fabulous time together!

I changed diapers, fed and burped the little guy, rocked him to sleep and e watched him sleep….I enjoyed every minute.

Look at that strawberry blonde hair…

I have a feeling frequent trips to the Sunshine State are in my future!

More WW posts are available here and here.

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