Atrophy (according to Wikipedia) is the partial or complete wasting away of a part of the body (in this case my left leg).

God has a whole post about atrophy in His body (the church) swirling around in my brain.  But, that will come at another time.

This post is about how God speaks to us.  He didn’t just speak to people in Bible times and then stop.  His Holy Spirit lives in us and guides us- if we listen.

Yesterday, returning from the doctor I was not in a happy place.  Trying to digest the fact that my muscle is atrophy-ing (no idea if that is a word) and they don’t know why and they don’t know how to stop it was overwhelming.  Making the appointments for all the tests they want to do to figure out the cause of the problem was overwhelming.  Trying to figure out how to discuss all this with my husband without him panicking was overwhelming.  Letting myself think of how unfair it is to have MS, Lupus and now- something else causing this issue- was overwhelming.

I had brought my Bible along for the ride (cause I can’t drive right now) but couldn’t bring myself to open it.  I did, however, turn on the radio and one of my favorite songs that we sing at church came on.  The song is “I will Rise” by Chris Tomlin.  There are many words that instantly touched my heart but here is the line that grabbed my soul:

There’s a peace I’ve come to know
Though my heart and flesh may fail
There’s an anchor for my soul
I can say “It is well”

Jesus has overcome
And the grave is overwhelmed
The victory is won
He is risen from the dead

Overwhelmed?  How about the fact that Jesus overwhelmed the grave?  That is overwhelming, not my temporary, temporal circumstances.

Feeling still a tad angry, I said to God “help me”.  And three words came to my mind (and I know that I know that I know God put them there)

Check your medications.

Clear as day and something that none of my doctor’s had bothered to do.  As soon as I got home I googled muscle wasting and the names of my medications.  Second med I typed in had a big warning about this problem.  Not trusting myself, I called my pharmacy.  My pharmacist researched it, called me back and said “Call your doctor right now.  You need to have some blood work done”.

Yes, I have called my doctor and yes, they are on top of it.

But, isn’t God awesome?  And, what if I had continued in my overwhelming pity party and not reached out to Him?  Would I have heard that still, small voice?

Hearing God is a finer thing!