I grew up listening to Psalty sing praise songs and Adventures in Odyssey play on the radio on Saturday mornings.

But I was an adult before I learned the true story of what Jesus sacrificed to save me while I was watching an Easter play in 1998.

The story came to life with the actors and choir and I was moved to the core of my heart by the story of the cross.

Jesus won me to Himself that day.  And, I have never been the same.

I have tried to be much more intentional about sharing the stories of the Bible with my children.  We open the Word for wisdom, guidance and direction.  When my boys were small, they loved hearing the story of Daniel and the lion’s den and the three men {whose names I know but am not going to attempt to spell} in the fiery furnace.

Now that the boys are older, we tend to focus on different stories, like Gideon’s fleece or King Hezekiah.  Men of courage and valor.  Men willing to make the hard choices at the Lord’s prompting.

I was so blessed to review this amazing new way to tell the stories of the Bible.

The music and lyrics truly bring these biblical stories to life.

Two of my favorites include It Must Be You (MOSES) sung by Bart Millard and Broken Praise (JOB) by Todd Smith.  I enjoyed every.single.song!  Jeremy Camp, Natalie Grant and many other talented Christian artists provide some of their best work for this CD!

I was moved to tears by these songs, peacefully lulled by the lyrics and moved by the musical movement of the stories God wrote.

This is what is being said about The Story:

THE STORY is an unparalleled project from the best-known artists in Christian music. The songs on THE STORY take timeless biblical stories and provide a completely new context into how God’s story of love and redemption intersects with our story of brokenness and failures resulting in a new story of hope and rescue. The CD contains 18 all-new songs written by multiple Dove Award-Winners Nichole Nordeman & Bernie Herms, produced by Brown Bannister & Bernie Herms, and a stellar line-up of artists across all major labels. (Music Inspired By) THE STORY is based on a collaboration with authors Randy Frazee (The Heart Of The Story) & Max Lucado (God’s Story Your Story) as well as Zondervan’s bible The Story.

You can find The Story at Amazon.com and on iTunes.

The Story (watch this video on YouTube for a sneak peek)

This would make a wonderful Christmas gift for family and friends of all ages!

*This is a sponsored review.  I was provided with The Story for my feedback.  All opinions and stories expressed are my own.

Therefore go and make disciplies of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Matthew 28:19

Tentative feet touch the water, he looks up for approval.  The sea of eyes fixed on him and his descent to crystal blue water causes him to turn his eyes to the water.  His cheeks burn bright, knowing that those eyes are watching him as he follows through in believer’s baptism.

Pastor speaks of wedding rings and symbolism. How a wedding ring doesn’t make you married but it does declare to the world you are spoken for. Of commitment and public declaration.

Youth pastor talks of courage required to touch feet to this water…this holy act of obedience.

And this boy, taller than he was yesterday in a voice deeper than it was yesterday, answers a resounding “yes” when asked if he has received Jesus as his personal Savior.

“Then it is my pleasure, Matthew, to baptize you in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, buried in baptism and raised to walk in the newness of life.”

He went in to the water my son and emerged my brother in Christ.

Applause erupts from the congregation and his smile is one of relief and joy.

Tucked back on the stage, his mama claps the loudest as her heart nearly bursts with the gratitude it holds.

Do you have insight in raising teens/tweens? Please link up your post below:

So what is the difference between someone who willfully indulges in sexual pleasures while ignoring the Bible on moral purity and someone who willfully indulges in the selfish pursuit of more and more material possessions while ignoring the Bible on caring for the poor?  The difference is that one involves a social taboo in the church and the other involves the social norm in the church. ~Radical, pg 111

Radical.  Weird.  Over the top.  Extreme.

Those are all words that people close to us have used to describe the changes in our family lifestyle over the last six months. 

I have to admit that the opinion of others, particularly my family, matters to me.  It hurts my heart that they don’t understand the level of radical obedience we are prayerfully subscribing to.

It scares me that we have just begun traveling this Biblical road and have already found it to be isolating and persecuted.

Which is probably why God has me reading Radical {for the third time in six months} right now and sharing my thoughts about it.

Which is probably why statements like “if our lives do not reflect radical compassion for the poor, there is reason to wonder if Christ is really in us at all” {Radical pg 111} spur me on to continue on this journey with my Jesus.

I look back on posts from quite some time ago and gratitude overwhelms me. I have been on this path for longer than I realized.  Reading Radical {in May 2010} did not change my life. 

 Jesus changed my life.

Jesus changed my heart.

I have known about God since childhood, I came to know Christ as my Redeemer in 1998.  But, my heart was not broken, surrendered, laid-out-bare-upon-the-altar until September 2008.  Since then I have been seeking Him, pursuing Him and being willing to be misunderstood in the process. {and failing miserably along the way}

This is really the core issue of it all.  Do we trust Him?  Do we trust Jesus when he tells us to give radically for the sake of the poor?  Do we trust Him when we begin using the resources he has given us to provide for others?  Do we trust him to know what is best for our lives, our families, and our financial futures?~ Radical, 124

My small group friends know that recently I have been struggling with making any type of unnecessary purchase.  For example, I love to decorate for the seasons, holidays..you name it, I decorate for it.  Yet, here it is the end of October and I have not decorated for fall.  Not because I don’t have a desire to but because I have been paralyzed by the heaviness of need around me.

I feel guilty about the time it would take from helping someone to get the decorations out and put them up.

I feel guilty about the amount of money I could use to help someone that I would instead spend on golden mums and assorted size pumpkins and gourds. 

A friend reminded me of the difference between condemnation and conviction and then Platt’s words echoed in my mind “Christ will change our desires, and we will long to sacrifice our resources for the glory of his name among them” Radical 127.  Another wise friend reminded me that ministry to my family is equally important and to ask them if decorating for the seasons is important to them. {and I am glad I asked because to my sentimental son it is important and therefore the decorations came out of the bins and up on the door}.  But, I still haven’t bought any mums.

Mums and fall wreaths are not bad.  What would be bad is if I blindly pursued my life and my desires while not having my heart and eyes opened to needs around me. “The war against materialism in our hearts is exactly that: a war” Radical 136.

The struggle between things of eternal value and things of material value is being fought in my heart.  It is tough. I don’t have the answers.  Which is good in a way because it sends me back to the Word to find them.

This post is linked to Radical Read-Along at Marla’s blog.

Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Matthew 11:28

Sometimes in the every day we forget to rest. 

Pause.

Reflect.

In the every day of pursuing passion, managing the mundane and finding the places in between, time passes by and it is time for the every day to begin again and rest does not arrive.

Isaiah 58 is my life chapter.  I tend to focus on the first twelve verses.  

Living out my true fast to the neglect of context.

Verses 13 and 14 hold the key to avoiding burn out, keeping {at least a thin} grasp of sanity and I have been forgetting, ignoring…

If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath and from doing as you please on my holy day, if you call the Sabbath a delight and the Lord’s holy day honorable, and if you honor it by not going your own way and not doing as you please or speaking idle words, then you will find your joy in the Lord, and I will cause you to ride on the heights of the land and to feast on the inheritance of your father Jacob.  The mouth of the Lord has spoken.  Isaiah 58: 13-14

God, our loving Father, set the example from the foundation of time.  On the seventh day He rested. 

It is in the resting, the times of quiet and nothing being planned that He can really speak to me.

For all the good things I may do matter not if I am not also drawing near to Him in times of rest.

Moments of holy rest.

Moments of quiet on the back porch with fresh brewed coffee and the sunrise.

Moments of sitting on comfy sofa with boys growing up too fast and listening to the grand standing of youth.

Moments of slumber that refresh not just my body but my soul as well.

Moments of writing in my journal, conversations between me and the paper and the Author.

I need rest, friend! 

Do you?

I would love to share this rest seeking journey with you.  Click here to receive posts directly to your inbox.

But according to Jesus, people are God’s method for winning the world to Himself (Radical, pg 90)

Making disciples is not an easy process.  It is trying.  It is messy.  It is slow, tedious, even painful at times.  It is all these things because it is relational. (Radical, pg 93)

Relationships are not easy.  We have so many relationships built into the fabric of our everyday life.  My relationship with my hubby, kids, the teen girls I work with, my parents, siblings, friends, church family…heck, I even have a relationship with my doctor’s receptionist {that is what happens when you have MS, I don’t even have to say my last name when I call LOL}.

Sometimes I get overwhelmed by the demands of the relationships in my life.  And, I admit that it makes me hesitant to go out and develop more.

But then I read the words in chapter five of Radical and realize that developing relationships is key to living out the Great Commission in my everyday life.

Disciple making is not about a program or an event but about a relationship.  As we share the gospel, we impart life, and this is the essence of making disciples.  Sharing the life of Christ.  (Radical, pg 96)

My husband and I are the Biblical Community Directors for our local church {small group, Sunday School, call it what you will}.  God has placed a passion on our hearts for authentic community and to have other believers connected with each other to live and share life.  I guess that is why this statement resonated so deeply with me as I read this chapter:

We will multiply the gospel only when we allow others to get close enough to us to see the life of Christ in action. (Radical, pg 99)

Yikes!  That requires being authentic…vulnerable…REAL.  Isn’t that where we tend to get hung up?  On having to extend trust to people that could {and probably will at some point} hurt us or let us down?

I do not have the room here {or the time, as Sweet Pea is stirring beside me} to share all I feel about the Discipling or Disinfecting portion of the chapter so please read it!!! How can we think that discipling takes place in church buildings across America? 

Discipling takes place by allowing others to see Jesus in us, through us.  Exuding His Word, His love, his hope to everyone we meet.  So, I am chewing, mulling over and praying on this statement this week:

A community of Christians each multiplying the gospel by going, baptizing, and teaching in the contexts where they live every day.  Is anything else, according to the Bible, even considered a church? (Radical, pg 106)

For more thoughts on Radical, head over to Marla’s blog.

I can feel her tears in my heart.  Eighteen years worth of hurt, disappointment, frustration and pain need to find a way out.

I crawl into bed beside her, waiting for her body to relax.

Minutes pass.

She turns and puts head on my shoulder and lets the sobs come.

I rub her back and put lips to her forehead.

No words are needed, just presence.

And I silently thank God for the excruciating times that allow me to know just what she needs in this moment..

as she learns to receive love.

And I also thank Him for…

#1. the comforting presence of Jesus

#2. pumpkin spice lattes

#3. husband who knows when it is a good day to bring pizza home

#4. boppy pillow that tricks Sweet Pea into thinking someone is holding her as she sleeps

#5. leaves changing colors, reminding me of the beauty of creation

#6. leggings under a dress with sparkly flats

#7. sermon on a Sunday that feels like it was written to speak just to my heart

#8. friends that love me because of who I am, not in spite of

#9. cuddling with the hubby, watching football

#10. quiet moments with my prayer journal and my Jesus

Join us in counting thanks here.

***this post may ramble.  I have been trying to process my thoughts and they are just not coming in an articulate fashion, no matter how hard I try***

I have always prided myself in being a self sufficient gal.  Life taught me early on that there was no one to depend on but myself and that placing trust in anyone or anything would just result in disappointment and hurt.  I was always applauded and praised for my independent streak and accomplishments. 

When I found Jesus, it took me a loooong time to understand that He would never reject me, disappoint me, or let me down.  I don’t know that even after all he has done for me I still completely grasp His unconditional (agape) love for me.  And, then I am reminded through this chapter that “in direct contradiction to the American dream, God actually delights in exalting our inability” (Radical, pg 47).

I need to be completely dependent on God, and I am not.  Plain and simple.  I don’t want to relinquish some of my worries, thinking that I can do a better job with them than my Creator.  It sickens me to type that but it is true.

So, the question in this third chapter of Radical is “whether we trust in His power” (Radical, pg 45).  My initial reaction was “of course I do.  God has proven Himself to me over and over and over”.  However, He has shown me, in glaring reality and stark contrast to what I thought, the areas where I hold back from Him and rely on my strength.

Do you realize how arrogant it is to think that I have all the answers in any given situation? 

If there is any life situation that proves that I don’t have all the answers, nor can I change things just in my own strength, it is parenting teenagers.  Especially broken teenagers who haven’t let Jesus heal their hearts yet.  Jason has hit a rough patch and Miss S. has experienced so much uncertainty and rejection in her short life it is hard for her to accept unconditional love from our family {though she desperately wants to}.

Then I am reminded that I am trying to love them {and fix them, which is not my job} in my own power.  And, this chapter of Radical reminds me that “the challenge for us is to live in such a way that we are radically dependent on and desperate for the power that ONLY God can provide” (Radical, pg 45)

My prayer this week, in working through this chapter, is that God will make more of Himself in my life and less, less, less of me.  That God will pierce my heart every time I try to take a matter into my own hands.  That He will remind me that when I release my own {pathetically limited} power, I block His.  Lord, help me to stop trying so hard and just let You reign in every situation in my life. ~Amen.

This post is linked to the Radical Read Along here.

Two years ago today my husband dialed 911 after I lost consciousness.

Two years ago I arrived via ambulance to the emergency room “in a fairly severe amount of physical distress and unresponsive…showing cyanosis peripherally as well as centrally.  Cool to touch and diaphoretic.  Difficulty getting a blood pressure reading on this patient.  Patient reveals a thready, spotty pulse, decreased capillary refill.  Digits are cold“… {taken from the medical records of my hospitalization}

Two years ago, despite my medical situation {pulmonary emboli}, I did not die.

Did I get lucky?

No.

Did God love me more than someone else who passed on that day?

No.

Was it my time?

No.

Ever since that day, my life has been different.  I have appreciated my existence in a way I never had before. 

And I begged God not to allow me to waste a day…

 because I do not know how many I have.

Every day is precious.

Since that night that I did not die, God has moved mountains in my path. 

Mountains of bitterness, unforgiveness, pride, arrogance, self-centeredness and pain.

Has it been an easy road?

No.

Has it been worth it?

Yes! 

I have lived as if I were dying and it is exhilirating, freeing and real.

I lived to see my boys reunited and my family start the long road of healing.

I lived to meet sweet blogging friends {and there are too many out there to mention but you know who you are} in real life!

I lived to reconcile with my Dad {after 13 years of not speaking}..God is so good!

I lived to reconcile with my dad, so I got to meet {and fall in love with} my little brother, Tsjaad.

And, I have spent time with my precious nephews, shared my testimony at numerous events, had the privilege of being there for more of my kid’s birthdays and everyday life, more motorcycle rides with my hubby, more dinners with friends, more singing on the worship team…

More living since the day I didn’t die.

And, the most important thing I have come to realize is that every day is a day I didn’t die.  A gift.  A gathering of moments meant to purposed.

What I do with those days is up to me.

I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. ~ John 15:5

What do You want me to see?

This is the question I asked God over the weekend.  My attention was drawn several times during our camping trip to a rather odd looking tree.

I knew that the Spirit was drawing my attention to the tree for a couple of reasons:

1. I’m not a woodsy, outdoorsy type of gal {big surprise, right?}  Sunsets are pretty, I think the Chesapeake Bay is the most beautiful place on earth {I could be partial} but the woods- they do nothing for me.  Trees are trees. 
2. I felt a catch in my spirit each time I walked past the forlorn looking tree.  I would look at it again, trying to figure out what I was missing.
3. No one else with me {this was a church camping retreat} seemed to be affected by the ugly tree.

Armed with those facts I knew that this must be something God was trying to show me.  So, I asked Him.

What do You want me to see?

I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener.  He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.  ~John 15:1-2

The tree caught my eye because only one side of it had any branches.  One side of the tree had full, leaf filled branches.  The other side was bark, just plain, old, DEAD bark.

(not a picture of the actual tree, courtest of Flickr)

If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers, such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned.  If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be given you.  This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, sh0wing yourselves to be my disciples. ~John 15:6-8

Reading through Radical by David Platt again, I find myself asking the Lord to renew my hunger for His Word, asking the Lord if I am bearing fruit and if the fruit I think I am bearing is pleasing to Him…

He used a tree, albeit a pathetic looking one, to show me the difference between branches connected and grafted to the Vine and those that fall off the Tree because they couldn’t remain there.

What do You want me to see?

Abide in Me, remain in Me, keep My Words in your heart and I will show you.

This post is linked to A Holy Experience.

God’s Word is enough for millions of believers who gather in house churches just like this one.  His Word is enough for millions of other believers who huddle in African jungles, South American rain forests, and Middle Eastern cities.

But is his Word enough for us? ~Radical, pg 26

This chapter {Chapter 2 for those not reading along} is convicting with a capital C.  Is God’s Word enough for me?

If I am completely honest, I act like the answer to that question is oft times, “No”. 

Is God’s Word enough for me?  Absolutely.  It is all we need.  But, I forget that far too often.  I allow the busyness of this American dream pursuing existence to push out the soft whisper of God’s Spirit, reminding me that the answers I seek are waiting for me in the pages of His Word.

I allow myself to believe the lie that I can do this thing called life on my own.  God is there when I need Him.  I go to church.  I do good things.  Hunger and thirst for the sake of righteousness is something I save for those times that I am desperate, broken and searching for the Answer I have allowed myself to drift from. 

I allow myself to be distracted with “the constant drivel of entertainment in our culture—and in our church” (Radical, pg 29).  There are far too many days that I don’t approach the throne of the Almighty until the end of the day, almost as an afterthought. 

 God, forgive me.

This attitude I have accepted fits “nicely in a culture that exalts self-sufficiency, self-esteem and self confidence.  We already have a fairly high view of our morality, so when we add a superstitious prayer, a subsequent dose of church attendance, and obedience to some of the Bible, we feel pretty sure that  we will be all right in the end” (Radical, pg 32)

Those words leap off the page to me.  Who am I to think that is enough?  Doesn’t the God who created me, who created the very universe I reside in, the God who existed before anything else came to be…doesn’t He deserve more of me than that?

Yes.

But that is so much easier to type than to live out.  For instance, do I have the faith, the belief and the devotion to Jesus Christ to applaud Him while my husband is beheaded for our belief (Radical pg 35)?  That resounding yes comes a little slower when I pause to consider such a circumstance.

Jesus is no longer one to be accepted or invited in but one who is infinitely worthy of our immediate and total surrender. (Radical, pg 39)

My prayer becomes this:

Lord God, strip away my comfort.  Position my life in a way that requires I drink of your Cup to survive.  Help me see my need for You in every circumstance, every day.  I don’t want to only turn to You when things aren’t going according to my plan.  I want to turn to You, God, for every request, every decision, every moment of every day.  And, God, I fail miserably at this.  I allow myself to fall into the trap of self-sufficiency thinking I am on the right path, not realizing that if I am not walking the path with You, then I have been deceived.  Open my eyes to Your will, to a hunger and thirst for Your Word that nothing but Your Word can quench.  Expose my need for You.  Expose the motives of my flesh.  Expose the pride of my heart.  Expose my deep down soul need for nothing but You.

You are enough.  You are enough.  You are enough.

This post is linked to the Radical Read Along.