Fun and Marriage

Do those two words even go together?  They should!  But sometimes with the busyness of life, the chaos of raising children and the monotony of the daily grind we can lose sight of the fact that we should be enjoying life with our spouse.  That is a dangerous place to be as fun is a great intimacy builder and can remind you why you were drawn to each other in the first place.

How can you make sure you and your hubby are still having fun together?  Here are a few ideas:

• Enjoy those inside jokes.  You know the ones that are just between you and your husband.  Wink at each other from across the room when you are reminded of such a joke.  Even when you aren’t physically close to each other you can both still be enjoying the memory or the hilarity of a shared inside joke.
• Watch a comedy.  Instead of dragging your hubby to the latest chick flick go see a local comedian or watch a funny movie. Some of our favorite side splitters are any of the National Lampoon movies and my hubby enjoys Monty Python as well.
• Step out of your comfort zone.  A few years ago Mike and I visited the batting cages for a date night.  We were both so rusty at hitting a baseball it ended up being a hilarious adventure.  We still laugh about my inability to hit a curve ball.  Do something you wouldn’t normally do together and be willing to laugh at yourself.
• Appreciate your spouse’s sense of humor.  Let’s face it.  Guys have a special kind of humor (and as a mom of boys, I can tell you that is apparently something they are born with).  Every once in a while, instead of rolling your eyes at your husband’s juvenile sense of humor, go with it.  Laugh with him.  Show him that you think he is funny.

Anything you do can be fun if you choose to make it that way.  Often times it just requires a change of attitude.  We enjoy cooking together and even cleaning together (we make it a race to see who gets done first).  Look for ways to insert fun in your marriage and you will find another way to bring you and your spouse together.

This post is linked to Wifey Wednesday.

Random Mama Updates (Advice Welcome)

Boy, I have a lot of random things in my multi-tasking brain to share with you.

First off a parenting dilemma (those of you with terrible two year olds- hug them and thank God that they are not terrible twelve year olds). As my regular readers know, Jared recently got a cell phone. This was a huge concession on my part but one I made because LITERALLY he was the only one on his middle school basketball team without one. But, the deal was he has to pay the pay-as-you-go bill with his allowance. Well, he has been slacking and didn’t earn enough to pay the bill this month.

His phone still works- he just didn’t have the money to pay extra for unlimited text.
Hubby and I decided to let him sweat this month out and it will probably never be an issue again.

Insert grandparents. Well meaning as they may be, Jared made his pleas to my mom (unsuccessfully, I might add) and then turned to my grandparents (cha-ching). They gave him the money to pay his bill. Hubby is mad and wants us to stick to our guns that he has to earn the money (his allowance is up to $40/month based on his chores, et. which is more than double the amount of his bill). I want to cut him some slack.

So, what say you bloggy friends? Hubby or Mama (and why?)
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Okay, onto a Not Me Monday worthy moment today (why today you ask? ‘Cause it’s Tuesday and the chances I will remember to share this next Monday is next to nuttin’)

Today my grandparents took me into DC for my weekly neurofeedback appointment. We then met my hubby in a shadier part of the city so he could take me home (my grandparents live in the other direction). Well, while waiting for him I had to go potty. (Thank goodness, just number one, if you know what I’m sayin’?).

My grandmother and I venture out to the gas station terminal. Now, we live in a small town so I am intimidated when a gas station employee has to have plate glass and metal bars between you and them. But, we proceeded. I really had to pee, ok?

We ask the attendant for a key. “We leave it open”. I thought “great, this is gonna be clean”. I am a little OCD. The smell hit you so bad when I opened the door I thought I was gonna puke. (it is a unisex bathroom left open, need I say more?) Then we realize there was no toilet paper. We go back into the station to try to buy some Kleenex or something. Due to the language barrier we ended up with napkins. Joy!

My grandmother and I went back in the nasty room, I kicked the seat down with my foot (don’t tell my physical therapist) and spread out napkins (two thick I might add) to sit on. Too bad I don’t have the leg strength to hover!

Tinkle Tinkle, my grandmother uses a baggie to pick up all the napkins and throw them in the trash and I go to wash my hands. Why wasn’t I surprised that the sink did not work and this is the one time in my life I did not bring hand sanitizer? So, we went back in the gas station and ended up spending $4.00 for antibacterial wipes so I could wash my hands (I felt like I needed a freakin’ shower).

Needless to say I was not in the best mood when my hubby got there to pick me up (I am one of those girls that won’t use a sani-pot).
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On to a happier note, I just finished reading a great book by Kristin Armstrong (Lance Armstrong’s ex) and will be posting my review tomorrow. Be on the lookout for a great read!

BlogBaby, the myth-the baby-the legend

Have you all met BlogBaby? No offense to the bazillion other wonderful blogs I follow and read everyday but BlogBaby is my favorite. I can’t help it. I mean a blog written by a baby? Hello? Doesn’t get much cuter than that! Add to that the amount of wit this baby has in her baby finger and you are promised an enjoyable read everyday!

To top it off, her BabyMama is a talented photographer who intersperses BlogBaby’s hilarious take on life with adorable pictures of her chubby little cheeks, beautiful eyes and fantabulous headbands in almost every post!

My hubby would never admit it but he has even started to ask how BlogBaby is doing because I talk about her so much! (I think hubby is secretly glad I have BlogBaby to live vicariously through because the last time I wanted another baby he had to go out and get me my chihuahua, Miles

So, anyway the reason I am writing this gushing post about my favorite online baby, you ask? Go check her out, you’ll understand! (I do have all boys that are in their tweens- need I say more?)

Teaching New Tricks

I am away from home right now- not at Blissdom ’09 but someplace just as great! Visiting my family in Florida and I brought the cold front with me My brother and his girlfriend aren’t enjoying the 50 degree weather as much but it’s great for me (heat and MS don’t mix well). So anyway, apparently home minus mama equals drama. Here are the things my hubby (with lots of help from my mom and friends in case you were going to feel sorry for him) has been dealing with in the short 24 hours since my departure:

*Matt thinking that the root of his tooth had snapped in his gums (this is apparently something he felt and concerned him a great deal). He couldn’t reach Mike on his cell phone because Mike didn’t have cell service at the job site. So, Matt tried to call my mom- she (in typical “my mom” absentmindedness) didn’t have her cell phone on her, so Matt ended up getting in touch with my friend, Rebecca.

Rebecca is one of my closest friends and I love her to death. But, Matt’s decision to call her cracked me up. Most of my friends (in my local area) are fellow SAHM/WAHM’s. Rebecca is a single, career focused gal. So, Matt calls her and gets her out of a meeting at work to tell her that he thinks the root of his tooth has broken and his proof of this is that he felt it and heard a sound. He couldn’t remember the name of our dentist or anything but wanted Rebecca to come pick him up from school (she is one of the many friends on the list of those allowed to do that). Rebecca, drawing on her zero, zilch, nada experience of dealing with such requests and knowing that I was 32,000 feet in the air at that moment did what any woman would do- she used a lifeline. I’d like to phone a friend, Regis, Meredith, whoever is hosting that show now…

Thankfully, she called a mutual friend and my business partner, Kelly. Kelly got a hold of my mom, mom picked Matt up and all was well with the world.

As for Matt’s tooth, I asked him tonight how it was doing and he told me the following scientific theory-

“Well, I have come to the conclusion that I am losing a tooth. What I felt was the baby tooth being pushed out of the way by my baby moler. It should all be over in a few days.”

Mystery solved and I feel so much better…

*Jared is not feeling well, just a head cold but still hard to be away from your kiddos when they are sick. He also has won and lost a basketball game in the two evenings I have not been home. Mike was able to be a cheerleader last night and a counselor this evening for the above results.

I have been assured they are doing their homework, brushing their teeth, changing their socks and all the other things I am worrying about from 861 miles away.
I’m learning a new thing and it is not easy. Seven more days to go!

Laughter Lives at the Smallwood’s

This post is part of “Laughter Lives! Tuesday” on the Riggs Family Blog. Check our their blog to read everyone else’s “Laughter Lives!” posts.

Pretty excited to participate in this blogger fun (and also excuse to publicly humiliate my children)

~I am not one of those that doesn’t use my last name, first name- heck I’ll give you my middle name (oops, I already do) and maiden name if you want. It doesn’t bother me. Hubby and I have talked about the “risks” of being on the internet but since I write for a living and use my full name- it just isn’t an issue for me. However, it is an issue for Jared, our twelve year old.

He has enjoyed the fact that I have become a blogger in the past year. The free stuff to play with while Mama writes reviews, the jokes and funny stories I tell about my blogger friends and the fact that my presence on the laptop provides them the illusion that I am not supervising them as closely (and then they are surprised when I say “get out of the cookie jar” hee, hee).

But, when this sentence left my mouth the other day “Oh, boy- that is gonna be a blog post” his opinion of my blogging did an abrupt about face and the conversation went something like this:
Well first a little background-

**For those of you that don’t follow this blog regularly (and why would that be, pray tell? Jared and I have a running battle about the length of his hair. He thinks it is cool to have enough hair to “flip” when in the presence of his “adoring fans” (his term for the 12 year old females that call my house to speak to MY son and I hang up on). I compromised with him about growing out his hair as long as he agreed to have it trimmed by my hairdresser before our church directory pictures- which he did without a fuss (he did fuss however about the matching outfits I made him and his little brother wear LOL).**

So, this hair length debate has been going on for at least eight months. Last week, we are driving in the car, on the way home from youth group, and I commented to Jared that his hair do was finally growing on me. He did not miss a beat and replied “Really? I was going to ask Dad to cut it this weekend”.

To which I replied- “you little snot, you have been doing this just to torture me”

His reply- “partly”

My reply- “oh,this is gonna be a blog post”

His reply- “you can’t write about me on your blog” (poor misinformed boy)

My reply- “Ummm, yeah I can and hate to break it to you but I already do on a regular basis. You can pretty much thank my readers for your basketball team’s successes this year”

His reply- “Well, that’s just great. Mom, you are so out of touch (can you believe these words of disrespect,sigh!) Don’t you know sexual predators are gonna come looking for me now?”

My reply- “Not if you cut your hair”.

Like I said, no problem finding humor in our house, or car in this case.
Happy Inauguration Day, folks!

Birthdays with the family

Join in the fun at Momdot and The Not so Blog, Blog.

One of today’s questions is
What was the best part of a past birthday that you shared with your kids?

Well, last night my hubby and boys took me out for an early birthday dinner (Jared has a basketball game tomorrow night and we have church on Wednesdays). TMI? Sorry LOL. Anywhoo, we had a blast!

I enjoyed my kids when they were little and there are times I miss those days so bad it hurts. But, times like last night remind me of what smart, clever, witty, sweet young men they are turning into. Their company was enjoyable and they had me laughing till I peed myself (literally) Thank goodness, by that time we were in the car. Then they looked at me like I was crazy, which just made me laugh harder.

They ordered off the adult menu (steaks) and ate everything on their plates! The days of kids meals in our house are gone. Jared shared a dessert with me and Matt shared one with Mike. They sang Happy Birthday to me at the top of their lungs in the middle of a restuarant (I think the happy clappy waitresses would have garnered less attention to our table).

So, as far as spending birthdays with my guys, this one has been pretty good so far. And, thanks fellas, for making your mama feel loved (and old).

Not Me Monday

I encourage you to join the fun of Not Me Monday over at MckMama’s blog, who by the way was named #1 Mom blogger of 2008 by the fab gals at MomDot.

And now to my not me’s:

~I did not cry like a baby while at the movie, Marley and Me. Some movies should be rated NT for will need tissues. And I did not read the book so I should not have known how the movie would end and anticipate that it would get to me- if I had I would have brought tissues- duh!

~I did not lock my keys in the car while picking up a prescription. This did not cause me to cry in the middle of a parking lot with bags from the grocery store ON THE GROUND (where else could I not put them?). My kids were not looking at me like I was insane and were not saying supportive things like “I forgot how much fun it is to spend time with you mom”. If that had happened it would have made for a really bad day so I am glad it did not happen, aren’t you?

~I did not glance at the Christmas tree all weekend and think “someone really needs to take that down”. I did not decide instead to join my hubby in watching the Rocky marathon on Friday, spending my Kohl’s cash on Saturday and hanging out with my family on Sunday. My tree is not still staring at me, begging me to get back on schedule and put it away. Nothing in my house would be that used to routine that it would notice when I am not following my annual holiday decorating schedule.

~I did not misjudge the size of my chihuahua’s new Christmas sweater so that it was a little too baggy. He did not pee all over it the first time he lifted his leg on a bush because it was too big and in the way. I did not yell at him as if he had bought the sweater in the wrong size.

Reading these I am so relieved that none of these things occured this week because I would really have to assume (had these things happened, which they did not) that my hormones *gasp* might have been a little haywire this week. Of course that is not the case and if it was I am the only one that would be allowed to mention that- if the hubby blamed any of the above on PMS it would be “off with his head” (which one would be my perogative hehe).

What did you not do this week, gals?

Short end of the stick

Apparently Tuesdays are turning into basketball inspired posts. (Well, this is sorta related, just stay with me here) My kids are SHORT. I don’t understand the problem. My hubby is 6’2″ and I’m average 5’5″. Jared is 4’9″, which doesn’t sound bad for a 12 1/2 year old until you put him in a middle school basketball team and there are children (who really must not be children, they have to be adults that have just failed 7th grade 6 or 7 times) that are a full foot or more taller than him.
Are these kids on steroids? miracle grow? do you sprinkle some special powder in their Wheaties? If you do, please tell me where to get it so my poor child is not jumping up and down trying to play defense against these giants (which he does really well, I must add).
Matt is no taller, in fact he had a growth hormone deficiency when he was smaller and didn’t grow out of 5T clothes until he was eight years old!
My MIL and hubby reassure me that he was small too until he hit 13 and then started shooting up like Jack and the beanstalk until he hit over six feet. Right now, I’ll be happy if these boys hit 5’9″.
Am I the only mom that worries about such things? Another thing I obsess over that I can’t control. But, I want my boys to be able to be chivalrous men that can reach items on high shelves for little old ladies and put the angels on top of Christmas trees someday.
If any of you are mama’s of giant (I mean, normal sized children) will you share your secrets with me so I can stop worrying about their future wives being subjected to a life of flat shoes?
Happy Tuesday…

Not Me Monday

Another Monday, another session of free therapy with MckMama’s Not Me meme. Join in the fun by visiting her blog.

~I did not dream of ways to make Jared’s basketball coach pay for demanding that kids wear black basketball shoes for the season. It didn’t take four stores on a frigid cold day to find a black pair in Jared’s size and I am not bitter about it, nope, not me!
~I did not get as happy as a kid in a candy store when my holiday newsletters arrived from Vistaprint. I am not so into Christmas that seeing my family in caricature form and our year in review makes me feel giddy.
~Speaking of being into Christmas, I was not secretly bitter that I have already received two Christmas cards before I have gotten mine in the mail. I am not that competitive and I know that such petty things are of no importance so I do not waste my time worrying about them.
~I did not consider getting up when my husband left for work this morning (3:30am) so that I could be further up on Mr. Linky at MckMama’s blog. I am not that competitive- did you hear me people? Not competitive-not me LOL

What have you not done this week? Go ahead, get it off your chest. After all it didn’t happen

Not Me Monday

Another Monday, another round of things I so did not do this past week ;-0 Stop by MckMama’s blog to join in the fun.

~I did not overdo it last week to the point that I was on crutches and now need physical therapy. I know my limitations and would never jeapordize my health by being stubborn and thinking I can be my old healthy self again, nooooo, not me.

~I did not get lost with my mom on the way home from physical therapy in a town that we visit regularly because one way streets do not confuse the daylights out of me. My sense of direction is way too developed to get lost in a familiar place.

~I did not leave the house several times wearing a shoe on my right foot and a way too big leapord print slipper on my left because it was the only thing I could get over my foot. And this was not at all embarassing to my two tween boys and I sooo did not get a slight chuckle out of the fact that I was embarassing them- he he.

~I did not experience a pang of envy listening to my young, successful, non married with children friend talk about her weekend plans. I am way too happy and satisfied with my life to wish I could have a moment to myself to have fun and not have to worry about the needs of anyone but me. I am way to mature for that!

So what about you? What did you not feel/do this week? Go ahead, get it off your chest!