Jennifer Shaw- Christian Music Artist

I love music.

According to my grandmother and mom, I always have.  I would say “put the do-do on” at a very young age (calling music “do-do” because those who loved on me would dance around singing “do-do-do-do”, etc…it didn’t take much to make me happy )

I took flute, piano and voice lessons as a girl and today I sing on the worship team at my church.

Why are you telling us this Melissa?

For a few reasons:

1. to convey how much I love music
2. to convey how daggone adorable I was as a toddler
3. to convey my love for a new CD I just reviewed

Jennifer Shaw’s Love Broke Through CD is an eclectic mix of songs…some fun and upbeat and some that showcase her background as a dramatic singer on stage.  

Not only does Jennifer have a beautiful voice and touching lyrics, she has a story to tell too.

And y’all know I love any story of how God moves in someones life!

To read Jennifer’s story visit her about page.  To listen to some of her songs click here.

I hope you will find yourself connecting with the songs as I did.

Music is one of my very favorite things and Jennifer Shaw’s CD went right on my iPod!  And I am not the only one that thinks her music is awesome- her first single from the CD, “Your Great Name”, quickly rose to the top 3 of the CMW Worship Charts!

Here is an even finer thing- the lovely folks that sent me Jennifer’s CD to review want to give one to one of my lucky readers!

If you want a chance to have Jennifer’s CD sent to you simply leave me a comment letting me know a song that has recently spoken to your heart.  I would love to hear your stories!

Details/Disclosure:  This giveaway is open to all residents of the US and Canada.  Open from 3/13/10- Wednesday 3/17/10 at 10pm. Winner will be chosen via random.org from qualifying comments and announced Thursday 3/18/10.  I was provided with a copy of this CD for review.  All opinions expressed are mine and not influenced in any way by any third party.

Reece’s Rainbow

I have always had a heart for children.  Children without loving families.  Children with special needs.

When I first started blogging I discovered the website, Reece’s Rainbow.  This is a ministry serving the needs of children around the world with Down Syndrome and other special needs, helping them find their forever families.  While it was not in the cards for my husband and I to adopt any of these special kids (my heart for our family is foster care) I will never tire of raising awareness of this special ministry.

On March 21, 2010 (to honor the 3rd copy of the 21st chromosome presented in Down syndrome), the world comes together to raise awareness and advocate for people living with Down syndrome.

Because Reece’s Rainbow has an international focus, we are doing our part to further the recognition of this very special day!

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress…

Spirituality and Teens- The “churches” job or ours?

My boys love going to youth group at church.  They look forward to it, they are upset if we have to miss (because they have strep throat, for instance) and even tell their friends how much fun they have at church.

I love that they feel this way about going to church on Wednesday nights and Sunday mornings. We discuss what they are learning on the way home and I am amazed (and sometimes amused) by what they have taken away from the lesson.

A few weeks ago I found myself a bit frustrated because the boys had gotten in the car for a few groups in a row with nothing concrete to share.  Questions like “what are they doing down there?”, “don’t they have a plan?” came out of my mouth.  Critical, unkind and judgmental words.

Great example, mama.

I was quickly convicted that my words were wrong.  I apologized to the boys and that night I laid praying about my quick tongue (it really gets me in trouble some times).  I was just as quickly convicted that my heart was not in the right place.

My child’s relationship with God is not the churches responsibility or the youth pastors responsibility.  It is my responsibility.

Ouch!

The bible points us to raising a child in the way he/she should go (live by example, get your child comfortable with the Word).  Darn it, there is not a word in there about youth pastors.

While I think that youth pastors have an incredible opportunity to make an impact on teens and tweens, their role by no means alleviates the responsibility to instill values, teaching and a love for the Word in our own children.

Does this make sense?  Do you feel the same way or disagree?  What about kids that aren’t being raised in Christian homes?  Discuss with me in the comments

And~if you have written a post about teens/tweens that you would like to showcase please put the permalink to the post in the MckLinky below.

Marriage Tips for Beginners

Mike and I will celebrate our 13th anniversary in July.  Every year we celebrate the fact that we have beat the odds, particularly for how young we were when we got married.  Today Sheila encouraged us to look back and think about what we wish we had known when we first became husband and wife.  By sharing those things the hope is that couples who have not been married for quite as long can benefit from the things we have learned in the trenches of marriage.

Here is my (by no means conclusive or exhaustive) list:

• Love is a verb not a feeling.  I do not always “feel” in love with Mike.  I hope that doesn’t sound mean because it’s not.  Most of the time those feelings have little to do with him and more to do with me.  With how busy I am, where I am in relationship with God, my fatigue level and illness.  Do I always love him?  Absolutely.  Why?  Because love is a decision, a choice, an action.  And I make the choice to love him everyday, the decision to be the best wife I can be every day and look for ways to act out that love (like putting the toilet paper so it rolls over even though I am an under girl)
• Date night is not neglecting your kids. I remember how guilty I felt each time (which was rarely back then) that Mike and I would go out alone.  I would spend the whole time calling home to make sure the kids were okay and when I wasn’t calling home I was talking about the kids.  It was years before I realized (after a marriage conference) that spending alone time with my hubby was vital to the health of our relationship. We began making that time sacred, focusing on us and our relationship, doing fun things together (love riding the motorcycle) and our marriage greatly benefited from it.  Let go of the mommy guilt.  A healthy marriage is actually one of the best things you can do for your children!
• Make sure you are on the same page.  So many of our early arguments could have been completely avoided if we understood where the other was coming from.  We frequently sit down and check in with each other to make sure we are working toward the same goals.  If you don’t understand something your spouse said or it seemed hurtful, double check with them.  I am amazed at the times I have told Mike something he said hurt my feelings and he looks at me like I have horns.  The way he said it or his choice of words was not meant to hurt me.  Huh?  Would’ve never known that if I hadn’t asked.
• In your anger do not sin.  The Bible is your life manual and it gives great advice for what NOT to do when you are angry.  Notice God doesn’t tell us not to get angry, He wired us to have feelings and emotions.  Our mandate is to not let the anger get the best of us and lead us to sin.  To lash back, to say hurtful things, to go to bed fuming about something your spouse did, to give the silent treatment…all of those are red flags that we are letting our anger cause us to sin.

I could go on and on with the things God has revealed to me during the last twelve years.  For more sound advice on marriage visit Wifey Wednesdays.

Tropicana Juicy Insider Program

I am excited to announce that I am an ambassador for the Tropicana Juicy Insider Program.  I was just reading a People magazine at the grocery store and saw an advertisement for the program and all of a sudden I felt a little special.

There are over 20,000 ways to save with this program.  Registering is easy.  Just visit www.tropicana.com.  Then with every specially marked package of Tropicana Orange Juice you will earn points to use towards rewards in this program.  These points can be used with companies like Adidas and EA Sports Active along with many other companies. One carton of Tropicana OJ can save you up to $15 on everything from tickets to the zoo to work out apparel.

I like to bring opportunities like this program to your attention because most of us buy orange juice for our families anyway.  This is a way to earn things in return for all the OJ we ingest (which in my house is a good bit )

**I wrote this review while participating in the Tropicana Juicy Insiders Ambassador program by Mom Central on behalf of Tropicana. I received 12 free Juicy Rewards points and a $50 Visa gift card to use in redemption of the points and to facilitate my review**

Fleeting Moments

As my boys grow up (up and up and up) I miss the days when my lap was their favorite seat.  When my hugs and kisses were welcomed.  When I was “the prettiest gwirl” in the world.

But that was then and this is now.  Now, my mere existence makes me the most embarrassing woman on the planet.  And kisses- ha!  Wiped off quicker than chocolate frosting from a doughnut.  Yet, the dogs can lick their face- can someone explain that to me?

Anyway, I digress.  Fridays are about finer things and Friday favorites.

That is why I smile to myself, as I type this post, and my 13 year old son’s head rests on my lap as he sleeps his cold/ear infection away.  I know these moments are fleeting- they are few and far between.

So I will sit here all day if need be and cherish every moment.

Children Count Too!

Every child loves a good game of hide and seek. There are the fun butterflies they get in their tummies when they’re waiting to be discovered and the pride they feel when they’re able to count to ten and then yelling, “Ready or not, here I come!”

But children who are hidden from the U.S. Census counts (taken only once every 10 years) are not a laughing matter. So, ready or not, here comes 2010 Census … and you have an important role to play!

Many parents may not realize the importance of accurately reporting the number of children in their family, including newborns. The truth is that the undercount of children means that we do not get a true picture of our nation and our communities do not get their rightful share of public funds.

Why Children Count Too
Children have been undercounted in every census since the first one in 1790. Local communities rely on census information in planning for schools, child care, health and other critical services. Babies need to be counted today, so they can benefit tomorrow from community services.

Census counts are used, in whole or in part, for more than 140 programs that distribute more than $400 billion of federal funds to states and localities, including such child-focused programs as:

• Special Education Grants to states ($10.8 billion)
• Head Start ($6.9 billion)
• State Children’s Health Insurance Program ($5.9 billion)
• Foster Care Title IV-E ($4.7 billion)
• Improving Teacher Quality State Grants ($2.9 billion)

Unlike adults, who may bear some responsibility for making sure they are counted in the Census, children are dependent on others to make sure they are included. Yet in 1980, 1990, and 2000, Census Bureau data show children, particularly young children, are one of the groups most likely to be missed in the Census. In fact, in the 2000 Census, there was a net undercount of more than 1 million children under age 10.

When playing hide and seek your children have the opportunity to be found after ten seconds.

The Census only comes around every ten years. So when you receive your Census form in mid-March, make sure your child (no matter how old) is counted!

**I am helping to spread the word about the Census as a partner with the Global Influence network.  I may receive a gift card for my participation in this campaign.**

Teens and Respect

Thank you all so much for the discussion that we had on last week’s topic.

This week I wanted to focus on respect.  Sunday I picked up the latest issue of Home Life magazine at church (shameless self promotion, I am quoted on page 54).  I also picked up the February issue and it had a very convicting article about the spiritual impact of your child’s disrespect. This article stepped all over my mama toes so I wanted to take a few minutes to discuss the meat of it today.

Here is the line that really stuck with me:

If you aren’t teaching your children to respect you, how can you expect them to respect other authority figures, and most importantly, a holy God?

I have to admit that my children were much more respectful of me (in tone, words and actions) when they were smaller.  I take responsibility for the decline in their respect because I am not nearly as consistent with discipline as I was when they were little.

To be honest, it was easier to discipline them when they were five and six years old.  A time out or sending them to bed early nipped behavior in the bud.  My boys were crushed if I was upset or disappointed in them.

That is simply no longer the case!  Grounding from privileges takes a lot of work to enforce and I often find myself giving in.  And, sometimes it really seems ineffective.  However, this article reminded me of parenting principles I had lost sight of including the fact that delayed obedience is disobedience.

Have any of you ever put off listening to God when He lays something on your heart?  I am guilty of that, for sure.  How will our kids ever understand the importance of following through with what God has in store for them if I don’t expect obedience from them the first time I make a request?

The article had the following tips for children that are resisting respect that I found helpful:

• Ban the use of a favorite technology until you see noticeable improvement in your child’s behavior (at this rate Jared will not get his cell phone back until he’s 30)
• Ask your child to rephrase statements to communicate respect (this would probably work better than getting angry and yelling back, huh?)
• Require your child to apologize to others if she (or he) publically displays disrespectful behavior to you. (This one really struck me as something that would be effective.  Kids this age hate being embarrassed yet we allow them to embarrass us with their behavior)
• Draw up a contract that specifically details your expectations and the consequences.  Have your child sign it (we did this after reading this article!)
• Consider seeing a qualified counselor to get to the root of the problem if your child demonstrates excessive aggression.

Aren’t these great tips?  I really needed to read this article because sometimes everyday my kids tell me I am so much stricter than their friend’s parents (and I start having mama guilt).  This article served to remind me that I am not responsible for parenting their friends.  I will give account to God one day for parenting Jason, Jared and Matt.  Period.  And, I am doing them no favors by not expecting the respect I deserve.

Especially when the result of not teaching them the value of respecting authority could have eternal consequences.

What do you think?  I would love to hear in the comments or feel free to write a post about this or any other topic applicable to Teens/Tweens and add it to the linky below.

Thanks a Million

I mostly rely on homemade foods to feed my (always ravenously hungry) crew of guys.  But, as we all know there are days that between basketball practice, church activities and doctors appointments a home cooked meal is just not in the cards.  Rather than spend extra money on fast food in these instances, I often rely on frozen entrees, like those made by Banquet.  My family particularly likes the salisbury steak entrees.

Since Banquet pot pies and other frozen entrees frequently find their way into my deep freezer I was glad to assist in spreading the word about the Banquet Thanks a Million program.  Inside specially marked packages of Banquet foods is the opportunity to win up to $100,000 for your family.  Pretty cool, huh?

So, next time you grab a Banquet meal from the freezer section of your local grocery store, be sure to grab a specially marked package and follow the instructions at the link above to see if you are a winner.

I wrote this review while participating in a blog campaign by Mom Central on behalf of Banquet and received a sample to facilitate my candid review. Mom Central sent me a gift card to thank me for taking the time to participate.

Did I settle? or did God know just what He was doing?

I haven’t participated in Wifey Wednesday in a while but the topic today struck a chord with me.  And you know what happens when a cord is struck?  I write. (and write and edit and write and so on)

…but it does mean that if you’re not happy in your marriage, perhaps we should stop focusing on whether or not he was the right one to marry, and start focusing on how WE can become the right one?

That is the phrase that struck a chord with me in Sheila’s post.  Mike and I got married young.  I was 18 years old, he was 24.  We already had a lot of grown up baggage (he had a son, I had a son and we had one on the way together, we didn’t know Jesus as our personal Savior, etc) to contend with and neither one of us had a grown up in homes that modeled what healthy marriage looked like.

In the early days of our marriage, I sometimes wondered if I had made a mistake.  We were so different.  We handled conflict different, we approached raising children different, we definitely had different approaches when it came to handling money.  Sometimes our differences seemed to etch a chasm between our hearts and prevent us from connecting and communicating.

We had been married a year and a half when I came to know Christ and two years when Mike accepted Jesus into his heart.  I would like to say that knowing God flipped a switch in our relationship and everything was fantabulous from that moment on….but I would be lying.

I can say, however, that as we grew in our faith and in our knowledge of what God intended marriage to be, we began to work on making our marriage better.  We saw a Christian counselor, we I read books, we attended marriage conferences, we sought sound counsel from older couples.

And our marriage evolved.

I went from days of wondering “why did I marry this guy?” to appreciating how God had wired Mike specifically to be my husband (and realizing that not just anyone could handle being married to this gal).  That appreciation has led to a deeper level of intimacy and a respect for my husband that did not exist in the early days of our marriage.

My encouragement to married couples is to seek to recognize the ways that God designed your spouse to complement your personality and needs.  Once you begin to notice the things that make your spouse right for you, it changes the whole dynamic of your relationship.

Heavenly Father, thank you for bringing the man I am meant to be with into my life.  Thank you for helping me see that we complete each other instead of giving up when ever discouraging times came our way.  Thank you for creating someone for me that allows me to be myself, that delights in my successes and is willing to go outside of his comfort zone to grow along side me.  Help us all see your design for marriage and adjust our expectations of our spouse accordingly. ~Amen.

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