Random Mama Updates (Advice Welcome)

Boy, I have a lot of random things in my multi-tasking brain to share with you.

First off a parenting dilemma (those of you with terrible two year olds- hug them and thank God that they are not terrible twelve year olds). As my regular readers know, Jared recently got a cell phone. This was a huge concession on my part but one I made because LITERALLY he was the only one on his middle school basketball team without one. But, the deal was he has to pay the pay-as-you-go bill with his allowance. Well, he has been slacking and didn’t earn enough to pay the bill this month.

His phone still works- he just didn’t have the money to pay extra for unlimited text.
Hubby and I decided to let him sweat this month out and it will probably never be an issue again.

Insert grandparents. Well meaning as they may be, Jared made his pleas to my mom (unsuccessfully, I might add) and then turned to my grandparents (cha-ching). They gave him the money to pay his bill. Hubby is mad and wants us to stick to our guns that he has to earn the money (his allowance is up to $40/month based on his chores, et. which is more than double the amount of his bill). I want to cut him some slack.

So, what say you bloggy friends? Hubby or Mama (and why?)
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Okay, onto a Not Me Monday worthy moment today (why today you ask? ‘Cause it’s Tuesday and the chances I will remember to share this next Monday is next to nuttin’)

Today my grandparents took me into DC for my weekly neurofeedback appointment. We then met my hubby in a shadier part of the city so he could take me home (my grandparents live in the other direction). Well, while waiting for him I had to go potty. (Thank goodness, just number one, if you know what I’m sayin’?).

My grandmother and I venture out to the gas station terminal. Now, we live in a small town so I am intimidated when a gas station employee has to have plate glass and metal bars between you and them. But, we proceeded. I really had to pee, ok?

We ask the attendant for a key. “We leave it open”. I thought “great, this is gonna be clean”. I am a little OCD. The smell hit you so bad when I opened the door I thought I was gonna puke. (it is a unisex bathroom left open, need I say more?) Then we realize there was no toilet paper. We go back into the station to try to buy some Kleenex or something. Due to the language barrier we ended up with napkins. Joy!

My grandmother and I went back in the nasty room, I kicked the seat down with my foot (don’t tell my physical therapist) and spread out napkins (two thick I might add) to sit on. Too bad I don’t have the leg strength to hover!

Tinkle Tinkle, my grandmother uses a baggie to pick up all the napkins and throw them in the trash and I go to wash my hands. Why wasn’t I surprised that the sink did not work and this is the one time in my life I did not bring hand sanitizer? So, we went back in the gas station and ended up spending $4.00 for antibacterial wipes so I could wash my hands (I felt like I needed a freakin’ shower).

Needless to say I was not in the best mood when my hubby got there to pick me up (I am one of those girls that won’t use a sani-pot).
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On to a happier note, I just finished reading a great book by Kristin Armstrong (Lance Armstrong’s ex) and will be posting my review tomorrow. Be on the lookout for a great read!

Kelwynne

I believe you need to go on your hubby’s side. He is the head of the household and the grandparents need to not step in. The boy does need to learn how to make it on his own and that is one of your jobs as a parent. ~K )
Alicia, The Snowflake

I’m afraid I agree with K. I would go with hubby’s judgement. He does need to learn control and self reliance. But it is definitely a difficult lesson to teach.

You are definitely a brave woman to go there. But I know what you mean by those moments when you just gotta go
Stephanie

Hubby. I agree with your previous commenters about his role as the father and head of household. The sooner they learn the harder lessons the better. Unless you want your 30+ year old son living with you (sponging off of you) one day!
Fiona

ugh I’m dreading this age! I agree with your other posters -hubby is head!
Xazmin

I’m with hubby. I’m the strict one in my family though. It’s hard for me to judge, because my oldest is only 10 – maybe 2 more years will change my perspective, but I really think our kids today don’t know what it’s like to ever really just make due!

Maybe I’m just mean though!!
Secret Mom Thoughts

OMG about the bathroom. Yuck. As far as the cell phone debate I would stick with hubby. Parents have to stick together and I think it is good to teach him responsibility.
He And Me + 3

Ok, since I don't have any kids old enough for cell phones…even though my 9 year old has a pay as you go…thanks to Grandmother, I don't have any advice…sorry, but we do know that when the minutes sweet grandma gave her are gone, then she has to either beg for more or work for the money. No hand outs here. Trying to teach responsibility is tough, but they have to learn & sometimes it isn't always an easy lesson. The bathroom story had me gagging the whole time, but you know me…I am OCD too. Right there with ya. I would not have been in a good mood after that either. Have a great Wednesday:)
Mommy Bee

He needs to pay his own bill. If he can’t make it this month, perhaps offer him an interest-free loan for 30/60 days, but he’s got to pay it back AND be paying his bill in the coming months.
A cell phone is a privilege, not a right, and if he can’t handle the responsibility of it, then he shouldn’t have it. When he’s an adult the cell company isn’t going to cut him slack if he doesn’t pay his bill, they will just stop his service (or charge him late fees). Don’t take the fall for him–let him learn the hard way now when it’s a little thing, and that will do him a much greater service in the long run.
Brooke

I would side with the hubby as well. Grandparents only mean well, but you are trying to teach him a lesson, so they need to take a backseat and let you parent.